Flirty, Fun, and Responsible Sexting Tips From an Expert
Let’s talk about sexting. It’s one of those things that’s kind of everywhere, but not always fully understood. We hear about it all the time, especially on social media and in TV shows, but what exactly does it mean? Is it just sending naked pics? And if you do choose to join in, how can you do it in a way that’s fun, safe, and respectful?
Don’t worry – we’ve got you covered with everything you need to know. From the basics to how to keep things chill and responsible, here’s the lowdown on sexting.
What Is Sexting Anyway?
At its core, sexting is just a way of sending messages, pictures, or videos with sexual or suggestive content. It’s an intimate form of communication that happens mostly through texting or messaging apps. You might be sending flirty messages, naughty pics, and videos, or voice memos that get a little steamy. It’s all about connecting with someone in a private way that feels exciting, fun, and consensual.
On DOWN, many people use sexting as a way to explore chemistry with matches, but it’s important to always make sure both parties are comfortable. Consent and privacy are key when things get personal – especially when meeting new people through a dating platform.
Why Do People Sext?
There are a ton of reasons why people sext. Here are a few of the most common ones:
- Flirting – Sexting can be a playful way to flirt with someone you’re into, especially if you’re in a long-distance situation or just want to add some spice to your relationship.
- Building Intimacy – For couples, sexting can be a way to stay connected when you’re apart or to deepen intimacy when you’re in person.
- Exploring Fantasies – Sexting can help you explore your own desires or fantasies with someone you trust, making it a fun way to open up without any pressure.
- Feeling Empowered – Some people find that sexting boosts their confidence. You can feel sexy and free in a way that makes you feel good about yourself.
But even though it can be fun and empowering, there are some important things to consider before jumping into sexting.
How to Sext?
Set the mood
Sexting isn’t just about the words you use – it’s about creating a vibe. Start with playful or flirty messages to test the waters and see if the other person is into it. A simple compliment or cheeky question can open the door to a spicier conversation. If they respond positively, you can take things up a notch.
Keep It Light at First
Think of sexting as a conversation, not a performance. Don’t dive straight into graphic messages, and ask for their ‘OK’ before you eventually send them. Start with something playful or suggestive and build up as the conversation flows naturally. Sexting should feel flirty without being overwhelming, giving both of you a chance to get comfortable.
Use Emojis (But Don’t Overdo It)
Emojis can add some fun to your messages and help set the tone. A well-placed 😏, 🔥, or 🍑 can make your texts feel more playful, but don’t go overboard – you don’t want your messages to feel like a game of charades.
Be Descriptive
Once you’re both feeling comfortable, get a little more creative. Paint a picture with your words to make your messages more engaging. Describe what you’d do if you were together, or share a fantasy in a way that feels natural.
Sexting Examples
Not sure what to say? Here’s Danielle Bezalel, a sex educator, with some sexting examples that can help you get the ball rolling with your match on DOWN.
Danielle is the host of the podcast “Sex Ed with DB,” where she dives into all things sexual health with a pleasure-first approach. Danielle’s got the perfect mix of brains and creativity to make tough topics accessible and entertaining.
Want to learn more with Danielle? Check out her podcast: Sex Ed with DB or catch her on Instagram.
Here are some examples on how to sext:
- If you were here, I’d start by running my hands through your hair and pulling you closer…
- I’ve been thinking about how soft your skin feels and how much I want to kiss every inch of you.
- Guess what I’m thinking about right now? I’ll give you a hint: it’s definitely you.
- Wish I could see your smile right now… or maybe more 😉
- I can’t stop thinking about how great you looked the other night.
- You’re making it really hard to focus on anything else right now 🔥
- You’re trouble, aren’t you? I can tell 😉
- I keep thinking about your smile… it’s totally distracting me 😏
- Your voice has been playing in my head all day… I can’t stop thinking about what you’d whisper if we were alone.
- I wish I could feel your hands on me right now… or maybe the other way around 😏.
- I just got out of the shower, and all I can think about is what it’d be like if you were here with me.
- I want to feel your body against mine and let my hands explore every inch of you 🔥
- I can’t wait to see you again… I’ve got a few ideas for how we’ll spend the night 😏
- If I had you all to myself tonight, I don’t think I’d be able to keep my hands off you.
- I’ve been replaying our last kiss in my head… imagining what would’ve happened if we didn’t stop.
- So, how much trouble are you planning to get me into? Asking for a friend 😉
- Tell me something you’ve been wanting to say… but haven’t had the chance to yet.
- You seem like the type who knows how to have fun. Care to prove me right?
- You have this way of distracting me without even trying… How do you do that?
- If I told you I was thinking about you in the shower, would you believe me?
- I should probably warn you… I’m in a very ‘bad ideas only’ kind of mood tonight 😉
- If I were there right now, we’d definitely be breaking a few rules 😉
- You know, this bed feels way too big without you in it…
- I’m not sure I can wait until I see you again… you’re making it impossible to behave.
- I should be sleeping, but you’re making it impossible to stop thinking about you…
- If I were there right now, what’s the first thing you’d want me to do?
- I’m pretty sure if you were here, this room would be way too hot to handle.
- Tell me exactly what you’d do to me if I were there right now… no holding back.
- Just imagining your hands on me is enough to drive me crazy. How am I supposed to wait until we meet?
- The way you kissed me last time? Yeah, I’ve been thinking about that all day.
Sexting can be a fun and intimate way to connect with someone, especially when you’re getting to know someone new on DOWN. But just like with any other form of communication, it’s important to keep things respectful, safe, and consensual. Be mindful of boundaries, take privacy seriously, and most importantly, have fun!