Everyone gets nervous when sending the first message, and a ‘hi’ is just boring. So here’s how to start a conversation on a dating app!
We’re kicking off a new series called ‘DOWN Dishes Dating Tips’ – who else should you take dating advice from? When a dating app itself gives you tips and tricks on how to nail a date or get laid, you take it!
In this article, we’re talking about how to start a conversation on a dating app. You’ve matched – congrats! But then comes the awkwardness of who texts first. Should you do it? Or should you wait for them to? If you’re on Bumble, then women always text first, but still – WHAT DO YOU TEXT???
We all know those ‘hi’ ‘how are you’ ‘how was your day’ ‘what’s up’ ‘hey’ are boring as hell. From a simple ‘hi’, it usually goes to ‘what did you do today’ and the conversation goes from there to just.. randomly talking about your day. Every day.
Want to explore and have some fun? Download DOWN and let your adventurous side out! Available on the App Store and Google Play.
So if you want to get better at starting a conversation with your match, here’s how you do it:
How To Start A Conversation On A Dating App
Before we get to it, check out these three convo starters for dating app chats, rated by a sex educator:
Danielle is the host of the podcast “Sex Ed with DB,” where she dives into all things sexual health with a pleasure-first approach. Danielle’s got the perfect mix of brains and creativity to make tough topics accessible and entertaining.
Want to learn more with Danielle? Check out her podcast: Sex Ed with DB or catch her on Instagram.
1. Ask about something specific in their picture
Here’s the thing, if they have no profile bio or just one picture, maybe this one isn’t for you. But if they do have more than one picture, you could definitely start a conversation! Point it out (if it’s a picture), and say that it’s funny/interesting/weird – whatever you want. Or start asking questions about it.
- “Oh what kind of fish is that?”
- “Wow, what a view! Where was it?”
- “That’s a really big zucchini in your pants… That is a zucchini, right?”
2. Would You Rather
This one is always fun, isn’t it? Think of some would you rather questions and shoot. They can be as dirty or as innocent as you want, it doesn’t really matter. You should also answer your own question, then explain, and ask him why he chose his answer. Boom. Conversation.
- “Would you rather make out in a concert or in a club?”
- “Would you rather kiss a frog or lick a foot?”
- “Would you rather have sex in a car or in the cinemas?”
But! Fear not if you don’t have the icebreaking skills to think up some WYR questions, because DOWN App does it for you! They have tons of WYR questions, all you need to do is click and hit send.
The app is free on both Google Play and App Store.
3. Ask something. Anything.
There are no rules here, you can literally ask anything you want! If you’re still confused, here’s some options;
- What do you do on the weekends?
- Who are three of the most important people in your life?
- What is your most useless skill?
- Favorite sport?
- Do you find it easy to open up to people?
- What are you passionate about in life?
Again, ask anything you like. There’s a stigma that asking too many questions can seem nosey or desperate, and now there’s also the fear of being considered weird if you ask too many questions, but it’s just being friendly and trying to come up with a conversation. If they think you’re weird for doing that, maybe go find someone else.
4. Compliment them
Compliment something unique about them—like their style or hobbies—rather than just looks. Here’s an example: “I love how you mix vintage and modern styles. So cool!”
But what if they only have one picture? No problem. You say “wow, you look really good in that one picture”. Or “Your name really rings a bell. Have we met somewhere?” Make something interesting, compliment them on the shoes they’re wearing, or the view in the picture, anything.
5. Ask what they’re looking for.
I know some people put it on their profile to make it clear, yet again, some people put nothing on their profile. If you’re on a dating app to look for something specific, maybe asking what they’re looking for is a good idea to start the conversation. That way you’d know whether to continue it at all!
If you’re too awkward for this, you don’t need to worry. There’s an app that does it for you. DOWN App has a swiping feature that allows you to differentiate your intentions. Looking for a one night stand? We got you. Looking for a serious relationship? We got you, too.
Want to explore and have some fun? Download DOWN and let your adventurous side out! Available on the App Store and Google Play.
6. Use pickup lines
I know pickup lines are corny, cheesy, tacky, old-fashioned, you name it. But when they work, they work. Sometimes you have to hit them with something expected yet totally unexpected. We have a list of flirty pick up lines that are corny but they’re also really funny! The thing is, you’ll never get a pickup line to sound impressive without it being cheesy – that’s just how it is. So, own it and make it work!
Those are 6 tips on how to start a conversation on a dating app. If you have any more you just thought off, by al means go for it! These tips come from DOWN Dating App ; an honest dating app that is sex positive and want their users to date honestly.
Bottom Line
Starting a conversation on a dating app is all about being yourself and showing genuine interest. Keep it fun, light, and personal, and you’ll have a better shot at making a real connection.
At DOWN, we make it easy to connect with people who share your vibe. So next time you swipe, start the convo with something creative and watch the magic happen!